On average, a hug between two people is about 1-3 seconds. But researchers have discovered something fantastic. That when a hug lasts longer, say 10-20 seconds, there is a therapeutic effect on the body and mind that is not only good for our marriage, but also helps in the following ways:
- The nurturing touch of a hug helps build trust and sense of safety.
- Hugging boosts oxytocin levels, causing us to feel closer and more connected.
- Hugs help to strengthen the immune system, keeping you healthy and disease free.
- Hugging boosts self-esteem, helping us feel better about ourselves and our lives.
- Hugs relax muscles and reduce tension in the body.
- Extending a hug raises serotonin levels, which lifts our mood and helps us to feel happier.
- Hugs are a lot like meditation and laughter, in that they teach us to let go and be present in the moment. Hugs get you out of your normal patterns, connecting you with your heart and your feelings.
- Lastly, the energy exchanged between two people hugging is an investment in their relationship, encouraging empathy, understanding, and trust between them.
“We need four hugs a day for survival. We need eight hugs a day for maintenance. We need twelve hugs a day for growth.” Family Therapist, Virginia Satir
So, what are you waiting for? All this and a better marriage can be had simply by taking our spouse in our arms and holding them tight. And when you do, don’t rush through it like you have in the past. Instead, take the time to hold them in your arms, feeling the warmth from their body premediate yours as you both begin to melt into one flesh, and the worries of your day just disappear.
Time spent in the arms of your spouse is never wasted.